Tales from the 5th Grade – Part I

Sometimes, when you have a tiny platform like this blog, you have to take the opportunity to reveal a slim glimpse into your real life.  To tell tales that might shed light on issues suffered by one or a few of the tens of Bon Mot readers.  To provide proof that the stories we recount about our not-so-little boy are as outlandish as you think.  To send a shout-out to the characters who shape our childhood – the teachers, neighbors, and friends.  And maybe to remind us all of what it was like to be ten again…  

This “Tales from the 5^th Grade” series was inspired by the hilarity of our kid and the struggles unique to parenting an eleven-teen ager.  Our son’s journey through 5^th grade has provided my husband and me more simultaneous challenges and joyful moments than we ever expected. Someone should have warned us that preparing for middle school requires serious effort and honing parenting skills we thought we had a few more years to sharpen.  This last elementary school lap has certainly tested our stamina.  Our race to attempt to navigate the need to promote his independence while limiting his exposure to the oh-no-you-didn’t moments is fraught with hurdles, and we didn’t adequately stretch for it.  Adolescence is a tricky thing, and 5^th grade is proving to be the portal to all those things we dreaded about parenting older kids.  We were sort of shocked and a little offended when he learned to decode our s-p-e-l-l-i-n-g of things years ago, but now he understands our inside jokes.  He’s sharp as a tack and listens even when he pretends he’s not.  Moreover, there’s something to this ‘smarter than a fifth grader’ business.  We’re half-way through the school year, and we’ve conquered the Periodic Table, the American Revolution, and mathematical order of operations.  We’ll soon tackle early iterations of algebra (these kids are barely 11 years old) and the Civil War and this will ALL be on the test.  So consider this your warning, my friends.  They’re gaining on us – in maturity and intellect and wit.

Tales of the 5^th  Grade Writer: This is How We ‘How To’

We recently embarked on a 5^th grade class project that proved to be a learning experience for the entire family.  What started as a simple writing assignment ended up being a culinary adventure none of us saw coming.  Our son was tasked with crafting an instructional paper and, ultimately, making a ‘how to’ video.  His class was given only a few restrictions for this assignment – nothing to do with video games and nothing too simple.  That’s it. The kids chose lots of fun topics, and it was quite the conversation starter for fifth grade moms.  We were amused by the obviousness of some of the kids’ choices – dancers chose to teach others to twirl, artists chose to teach others how to sketch a particular object; you get the idea.  

So ask me what our precocious kid chose to write about for the assignment.  Keep in mind that his interests vary from art to soccer to playing the ukulele.  Yep, that’s right, he chose “How to make a French macaron!”  Now ask me if I’d ever made a French macaron before.  Nope, never.  It wasn’t as if I whipped up a delicious batch every Christmas for the family to enjoy with a warm cup of apple cider.  This ‘how to’ idea materialized seemingly from thin, well-whipped air. (Thank you, kids’ cooking shows…)  What honestly didn’t occur to me during our conversations early-on about the assignment was that we would actually eventually have to DO the how to.  The video and tasting parts of the assignment didn’t trickle home until we were already committed to making these delicate French pastries that take serious time and experimentation to perfect.  When asked why he chose this complicated endeavor for the assignment, our son simply replied, “I’ve always wanted to make French macarons, and I thought this was a good opportunity to learn.”  Plus, the recipe he found online during his search at school guaranteed “the perfect macarons every time.”  Well, who can argue with that?

In light of our 5^th grader’s enthusiasm for his project despite the raw (under baked, you get it…) territory, we did the best thing you can in a situation like this — we learned while teaching.  And I began to appreciate the ambitious nature of our young chef.  He wasn’t deterred by the idea of making macarons so neither was I.  We lived to tell this 5^th grade tale, and it was a tasty one. 

For those wondering, here’s how it turned out —

A few things to note:

1. The YouTube video documents the first (literally THE first) time anyone in our family tried to make French Macarons.
2. The second batch of macarons, the ones the students ate, looked and tasted much better than the first ones we made when shooting the video.  (They’re pictured above.)
3. Yes, he actually broke the knob off of the stove trying to preheat.  I reminded him “push then turn” several times before we started recording.  We even practiced it, but it obviously wasn’t enough of a reminder and resulted in a VERY costly repair. Sigh.
4. Truth be told, the thing that made me grumpiest about this whole exercise was that I had to go to Whole Foods, one of my least favorite places, to get almond flour.  Double sigh.
5. Now that we’ve mastered the French macaron, I think we might put it in holiday recipe rotation.

“Careful cooking is love.” – Julia Child

Stay tuned for more Tales from the Fifth Grade…

Hey Bon Mot Mamas — I know I am not alone in recounting these zany tales! What are yours?